i don't get why he doesn't want it! Help please?
Me and my bf (well now ex) broke up because he is moving to Italy to play for the professional basketball. He knew that we wouldn't ever talk or see each other so he said "i love you too much to put you through that". So we broke up and we have both been miserable ever since. I suggested that i move with him after i graduate because i love him so much and i honestly don't know what i would do without my best friend. we got into an argument about it because he said that i have goals and i can only achieve them here (in USA). he told me the other night that he is the stupidest man in the world because hes choosing basketball over me and i don't get why he said that because he has wanted to be a pro basketball player all his life and it seems like im standing in his way. I want him to go and i am so proud of him i really am but i still want to be with him. he also told me that he would always be my bf and in parenthesis he put best friend. i want to be a nurse so how can i not achieve it there? and he says that i have family and friends and that it would ruin my life. but honestly not being with him would ruin my life. i h8t mostly all of my family and after i graduate im only going to talk to my really close friends so it doesnt matter to me. i doubt its because he wants sex from others cause even he said he would deff miss it. so if he loves me so much why can't he just let me go there with him? please help
Other - Family & Relationships - 4 Answers
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1 :
You can be a nurse anywhere! In the EU we're crying our for nurses, so you'd get a job really easily. You need to tell him you'd rather be with him over your failmy. And hey - you can always visit home once or twice a year and see them. Either that or he is hiding something from you, and doesn't want you to go to Italy and find out.
2 :
first of all why would he go to italy to play basketball when there are plenty of teams here. Second he is doing his best to make you go away. Have you ever asked yourself why. Things of the heart are not always simple. Good luck
3 :
Frankly put, go after this one. To me it sounds like he cares and loves you deeply but has decided to chase his personal dream and goal. He is releasing you from any emotional bond between you two, but knows deep down that this won't fix the issue. You both love each other, have him rethink what is happening to your relationship and let him know that, yes you and he are matched and that you want him to chase his dream but that you will also chase yours. That is you will finish school and follow him. He may be concerned about fans or being away from his home once he gets to where he is going. Then again he might not want any emotional ties because he wants to sink his all into the game. Ask HIM to marry you, if you feel very strongly about it. That is only if you feel that attached. If not, then you probably ready yourself to move on with each others life separately. Good luck.
4 :
I have a feeling that his life in Italy has been decided for him by other people...such as coaches, sponsors, and team owners, and you are not part of it. He could have been told that bringing a girlfriend is not part of the program for him. People who are investing time and money in him, do not want him to be influenced by someone, or something that could affect his performance on the court, and end up with him not playing at his best. Instead of telling you how it really is, he's back pedaling with all this nonsense about how it "would hold you back". Time to cut through all the nonsense and excuses, and get him to come to the real point about why he can't, or won't take you.
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