my sister having power of attorney?
I found out about 2 weeks ago that my sister put my mom in a nursing home without telling me or my dad of this. She has mom's Power of Attorney. I phoned her to ask for mom's phone number at the nursing home , she said she would email it to me, but never did. I searched in internet and found the home my mom is in, but when I asked to talk to my mom they said to me "Im sorry maam but first we have to talk to your mom's Power of Attorney and then we will let you know if you can talk to her or not. This is very frustrating for me as I live in Italy and my mom, dad, and sister live in Canada. What are my rights? Weren't they supposed to advise me about my sister having become my mom's Power of Attorney? My sister also said that I was never welcomed there anymore and that I had abbandoned my family, which is not true, at the time I married and moved to Italy my mom and dad where very young and healthy and in no need of help. Please someone give me some answers because I dont know what to do anymore. A very complicated situation. Thank you in advance. I have always been present even if I am living in Italy. I have always been in contact with my family in Canada. This doesn't give my sister the power to do what she wants without telling me anything. I am not questioning what she did, I am only questioning that she should have advised me about it. So before calling me a miserable absent child i would suggest you know the whole story behind all of this, then we will see who you will be calling a miserable absent child. Measure your words before writing them down. Thank you . Thank you James
Law & Ethics - 3 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
If she has power of attorney, she doesn't need to inform you of anything and has complete control of your mother. Every decision she makes, it's legally the same as if your mother herself made it.
2 :
You miserable absent child. You did not take the time to be more involved with your mom and NOW you want to participate. Shame on you.
3 :
The only way you could contest the POA is if your mother was not mentally sound when she signed the document, or your sister is abusing her powers as the POA. Nobody is required to tell you that your mother is about to sign a POA or already has. The nursing home may have not told your sister that you called and want to be allowed phone contact. Nursing homes are understaffed with caring for people physically present and would rather not spend time conveying messages for family members who aren't speaking. When you first moved, your mother may have been fine, but at some point, she declined and needed more and more care, which your sister provided while you were not around to notice. She resents you for this. Once your mother dies, the two of you will probably never reconcile this issue, so now would be the time to try. Keep emailing your sister. Keep calling the nursing home. You'll get to know the staff and they will recognize you as an interested party, eventually sharing info with you. Just don't use this info to lord over your sister, or the nursing home will shut down communications with you because it's more trouble than it's worth. Here's a way to get through to your mother: send lots of cards, all containing your name, address, phone number, and picture. Eventually, one will get through, giving your mother a means by which to contact you. She's bound to hold on to several of them. Things get all over the nursing home, so even if your sister finds some of the cards and takes them, chances are that the rest were taken by a confused resident and put in a plant, under the t.v., etc. Also send her flowers. They will deliver the flowers directly to your mother, who will naturally want to know who sent them- the staff won't think to withhold the tiny little card sticking out from the bouquet. You could also fly in and visit your mother.
Read more discussion :
